Monday, 1:30pm mammogram
Room is pleasant, tech is a lady I know from church. Plenty of chit chat. She explains the procedure, how they compare the films with a database of other mammograms that have shown signs of cancer. That's cool, I think to myself. She says "wait here while I get these cleared by the radiologist." She comes back and states he needs "another press" of one angle. She takes three or four more pictures then takes those heavy square x-ray plate things back to their little processing room to the side of the exam area. It's then that I notice that she had put the film in question - the one he wanted another "press" of - on the light box on the wall. I started to gather my things and the next time I turned around the film was gone and the light box was dark.
This film looked, to my untrained eyes, like any picture you've ever seen of a mammogram with some kind of white spot in the middle. Slight panic.
I go across the hall, have the sonogram, and she says "wait here while I get this cleared by the radiologist and make sure he doesn't want to talk with you about anything." I questioned, "he would talk to me if there was a problem?" She said she thought he would if there was a problem.
She came back and said "go ahead and get dressed, he doesn't need to talk to you. That sounds like good news!" I just look at her thinking she is telling me a complete bold faced lie but I didn't ask about the film I saw - I just left and went home slightly concerned wondering what in the world I had seen.
Tuesday Morning I phoned my doctor's office and talked to Jill (I think she's the office manager but I don't really know). I asked when we'd get some kind of word back and she said they NEVER get the report back the next day - it would be at least Wednesday or Thursday. I told her the story of seeing the film with the white spot that looks just like all the descriptions on the breast cancer web sites.
Wednesday I think and stress and worry. All. Day. Knit knit knit knit knit knit knit. I knit half a sweater on Wednesday and nearly finished a sock. Almost time to get the second sock started - I'm so rockin' on Christmas knitting.
Thursday morning (today) 7:30am, I take Emeline to the doctor for another x-ray on her arm - knit knit knit knit knit knit knit. Only a few more rows to go on that sock toe. Get home and start back on the sweater. Need more yarn. "How much?", I think to myself. "Mmm... one skein? Better make it two."
10:30am Phone rings. Jill says "There is a benign cyst in your right breast. Benign. It's okay. Does that help to ease your mind?"
I phone Jeff. "Looks like I'll live until Christmas... there's a benign cyst and they want me to come back for another ultrasound in three months. Can you pick up two skeins of yarn for me?"
I'm finally winding down from the worry. It's time to breathe.